UCLA at USC, November 18
Pessimist: Go ahead.
Optimist: You first, I insist. I want to hear your negative take on the Crosstown Showdown.
Pessimist: Negative. Pssssh, your face is negative.
Optimist: Very adult of you.
Pessimist: More adult than you.
Optimist: Stop trying to make this into a scene out of Rosencratz and Guildenstern are Dead. No one will get the reference. Just talk about USC for Pete’s sake!
Pessimist: Fine! USC is going to destroy UCLA. Sam Darnold will own the Bruins on his way to a National Championship. A big freaking LOSS!
Optimist: Of course. Unlike you, I am taking into account how huge this game will be for the Bruins as they are in the hunt for the Pac-12 South. Rosen will have an amazing game, embarrassing the Trojans on their home field and knocking them out of contention for the division. HUGE WIN!
Optimistic View 9-2 | Pessimistic View 3-8
UCLA vs Cal, November 24
Pessimist: Me first, because I am sick of this preview already, especially with the way things are going so far. Just like last season, UCLA falls flat on their face against Cal and ends a miserable season. Loss.
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Optimist: Are you seriously predicting a 3-9 season? You really think they will do worse than last year?
Pessimist: Yes and it will end with Mora getting the boot, finally!
Optimist: Whatever, bro. I see it differently. UCLA gets the win over Cal, wins the South Division, goes to the Pac-12 Championship and gets a New Year’s Eve Bowl. Win.
Pessimist: 10-2? You are an optimist. There is no way that happens, sunshine! You are smoking some bad granola.
Optimist: It’s a lot more realistic than 3-9, especially with all the talent on this team.
Pessimist: And that is why Mora will be fired, because he had all this talent and did worse than last year.
Optimist: Jedd Fisch is going to have this offense ready.
Pessimist: Yeah, no doubt it will be offensive! Ha!
Optimist: You know what, you are a blue and gold pain in the…
FINAL RECORDS: Optimistic View 10-2 | Pessimistic View 3-9
Next: UCLA Football Should Have Fall Camp in San Bernardino
And from there, the Optimistic Bruin and the Pessimistic Bruin lived forever, eternally arguing over what UCLA Football will become in the future. Both feverishly arguing their point and becoming elated when their predictions come true from season to season. UCLA will have highs and lows throughout time and each Bruin gets their chance to shine with their respective corners of belief. Ah yes, the circle of Bruin life. *Rolls eyes*